Let Them Drink

November 9th, 2007

Let’s stop this nonsense right now.

Stop telling me that we have to discipline parents who let their young sons and daughters drink at home. And stop calling them “ teenagers”. You’re not a “middle-ager” or an “old senile-ager” are you? Maybe you’re a “twenty something-ager”? Sounds dopey doesn’t it. Imagine being a “teen”-ager? Hearing that goddamn term over and over until you want to hurl all that beer you just chugged.

European young people between the ages of 13 and 19 and even younger are served alcoholic beverages based upon the decisions of the people who understand them best. Their parents.

Not some idiotic prohibition that leaves an entire group of people out of the equation, people drinking excessively simply because a common cultural practice, consuming alcohol, has them outside the saloon looking in.

Why is it when people become adults, they also become morons? Adults make smart ass decisions to start wars they can’t win. They spend more money than they earn. They whine when taxes are raised to keep their toilets from backing up and the faucets in the kitchen from delivering water as thirst quenching as sipping effluent from the Ganges.

Adults are morons because they prohibit, using their size, power, and money , all those wonderful highs sold to us in HD during NFL timeouts. We learn quickly, at a much younger age, say 5 or 6 perhaps, that success in life entails downing monstrous amounts of a strange,” no-no” named “beer”. Once our voices change and hair appears in places we’re not used to seeing it grow, that “no-no” turns into 30 empty cans rolling around on the floor in the backseat of the family four door.

If American adults, always on the multi- media highway looking for another pill to swallow, want to prohibit young drunken drivers from parking their cars into trees, find a drug that makes common sense a side effect of turning moronic adults back into the kind of persons people of all ages can respect. Let your young people ease into the enjoyment of having a drink. Invite them into the saloon and show them how to drink responsibly. That’s what being a good parent means to the rest of a world not hornswoggled by this insane, and deadly prohibition.

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